Thank you everyone who picked up the sketchbook! It's been a huge help and relief after a rough tax bill. If you missed it last week, I put together a 183-page digital sketchbook that you can purchase for a minimum of $7 right HERE! Grabbing this is a great way to support me and Paranatural! You can also support my work on Patreon or Ko-fi! Thank you again everybody! I really appreciate it!

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[Transcript]

        “Hold your hearses, son,” Davy said to Gage, guiding the vampire teen back towards his seat. “Haven’t you heard that good things come to those who wait? What’s the hurry?” Davy grinned. “You’re not getting any older.”

        Gage gave his boss the closest look to spite that he could find the nerve to muster. Coming here was a terrible idea. He’d let anger and exhaustion get the better of him, and it was hours past his bedtime. Gage should have been snoozing in the rafters of a ramshackle small business by now, not sitting in a sunlit room awaiting his obnoxious sire’s attention.

        “You asked me to come to you if—” Gage bit his tongue (an extra-painful effort for a vampire). “You gave me your business card.” He didn’t dare pull it out of his pocket. Davy would have a psychoanalytic field day if he saw that Gage had crumpled his contact information and then struggled to smooth out the wrinkles for forty-five minutes.

        “Yes, well,” Davy sighed, “it has a phone number on it for a reason.” He snagged Gage’s shoulder with his hook hand when his minion moved to leave. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding! My word. You young vampires can take a bullet, a beating, and blood from the innocent, but you still can’t take a joke! THAT’S A JOKE, TOO! STOP OVERREACTING!”

        “I’m NOT,” said an exasperated Gage.

        “That’s the joke!” sighed Davy, glancing at the mayor for some middle-aged-male solidarity.

        “HA!” laughed one half of the mayor, mostly out of pre-assassination-attempt social anxiety. The Hijacks had been busy reflecting on the fact that the last time they had seen this weird vampire teen, they had been a funny little goldfish in a bag. The world was a beautiful, whimsical place... and it would be even more beautiful once a ten count in a sunbeam put old Davy in the dust bin.

        “All right, I get it,” shrugged Davy, sitting back against his desk. “You’re not here to play around. You’re serious. Well, that makes two of us, son—and you the odd man out, Mr. Mayor. No offense.”
        
        “None taken,” replied Mayor Hijack. Logically, he was not the odd man out, because he was two guys inside of a third guy. This made him a veto-proof supermajority, which meant that he could lawfully destroy anybody that he wanted to, including Davy Jones.

        “That’s why I like you, Bill. The best politicians get out of the way for big business. That’s what you’ve brought me, isn’t it, son? You wouldn’t waste my time for anything less... right?” Davy smirked at Gage and coaxed him closer. “You have the floor. Speak your mind, son. How’d the rest of our little PTA soiree go for you and your lady friend? You’re not here for a shoulder to cry on, are you? A triumphant high-five, perhaps?” Davy raised his hook expectantly.

        “...That’s not what’s on my mind,” lied Gage. It at least wasn’t what he wanted to speak about with Davy.

        “Now, son,” sighed Davy Jones, arching an archvillain eyebrow. “Don’t try to hide the painful truth from me. You know I can insist for your own good if you’re ashamed to ask for help.”

        Gage narrowed his eyes at his sire. He knew that Davy didn’t actually care about his love life—or lack thereof—but it wasn’t like he had anybody else left to complain to. His dysfunctional family had moved away years ago, still believing he’d cut ties with them and left Bayview himself. Paige had only texted him for proof of life... like she even actually cared. Youthy was currently hanging from the ceiling of his van in the garage downstairs, pretending to sleep and refusing to speak to him. Evidently, saving her life from sudden death by daylight wasn’t enough of an apology for... whatever he did wrong. Gage didn’t see why everybody else got to be angry at him. HE was the one who’d been heart-crushingly humiliated.

        “...I tried to make a move and Paige freaked out on me like I was a total disgusting creep,” Gage grumbled, shoving his hands in his pockets. “There. Are you happy??”

        Davy and the mayor exchanged a glance of parental concern.

        “Of course I’m happy,” Davy said with a shrug. “It comes with the conquered territory when you’re rich, immortal, invincible, and adored by the wonderful son your hard work spoils. Not that you need all those things to find joy in life’s simpler pleasures. Just ask our cheerful mayor over here!” he added, jabbing his hook at the mortal and moneyless Bill, a man whose son had robbed him and then “skipped town” after high school.

        “It’s true,” the mayor droned out of the left side of his mustache. Evidence suggested that Davy was objectively enjoying his unlife, even though his wonderful son hated him, and even though he had like three different weird vampire weaknesses that could explode him in an instant. Money alone really could buy happiness; the data didn’t lie.

        “Okay?” Gage scoffed. “Good for you?”

        “What’s good for the ghoul is good for the goblin, young man. My point is you should follow our example!” Davy rose from his seat against his desk, slinging his jacket over his shoulder to complete his PSA look. “That’s how you’ll get your girl, my boy, or finally get over her. Unlive a little! Start a business, get involved in local politics, change your look like Mayor Spender did! Er, not exactly like he did, mind you... but, pun intended, do revamp yourself. Brush your fangs, comb your hair, get more sunlight—work on YOU for a while. Eventually, you’ll either meet HER standards or raise YOURS beyond her reach! There are plenty of mosquitoes in the swamp.”

        While Gage stewed in surly skepticism, the Hijacks were having a crisis of their own. Mayor Spender? Is THAT what Davy had called him?! Everyone had been referring to him as “Mr. Mayor” this whole time. He’d thought that was his name, like a dynastic title, or a gimmick for the ballot so he didn’t have to come up with a platform. “Bill” was short for basically anything; he figured his full moniker was “Mr. Wilby Mayor” or something obnoxious like that... but no, it was the completely normal and serious birth name “Bill Spender”! No wonder this body felt vaguely familiar: he was piloting an older model of the Activity Club’s bumbling ringleader!

        Oh shoot, Hijack thought. Oh shoot, he thought again, this time from the other side of his bisected brain. He’d honestly been kind of ready to fully sacrifice the mayor in order to destroy Davy Jones. One particularly grim fantasy involved tackling him straight through the window to the island and ocean below. What would Max and Isabel say, though, if the Hijacks super murdered their teacher’s father or uncle or much older brother?? Not doing stuff like that was like the whole lesson they’d tried to teach him, probably. On second thought, wouldn’t Cody be kind of annoyed if his father got totally vaporized? Each half of Hijack half-remembered Cody saying something about not wanting him to get hurt... and that was why he’d wanted to sic his werewolf mom on him, or something.

        The Hijacks balled the mayor’s meaty fists. They were just too good at being bad! All of their superheroism relied upon scary parasite supervillain tactics! They’d definitely gotten too excited after the first strings they’d pulled as a politician started looking strong enough to serve as a deadly garotte. Absolute mayoral power really DID absolutely corrupt! If they were this bloodthirsty, were they really any better than a vampire like Davy? Yes, definitely! But still...!

        “No offense,” Gage grumbled up at Davy, “but I don’t think being more like you would make Paige like me more. She’d definitely like me even less.”

        Davy’s smile took on a smug slant.

        “...And why is that?” 

        Gage twitched, remembering again who he was talking to. Why did he keep letting himself drop his guard around a monster like Davy Jones??

        “Is there something you’d like to report to me, young man?” the vampire overlord asked, stalking closer. “You do remember what I asked when last we spoke, don’t you? Is that why you’re here? To prove your loyalty? Or is it... to DISPROVE somebody else’s?”

        “N-no, I just—” Gage quickly looked away from the piercing nocturnal glow of Davy’s scrutinizing gaze. “I just... always followed PAIGE’S orders, so... since you gave me your card, I just thought...” 

        Gage’s hand closed around Davy’s business card in his pocket. What HAD he been thinking? This was a mistake. He’d been chasing the pitch of the promise that Davy had made, or at least the fleeting feeling it had given him—the feeling that he could be more than he was. That world hadn’t manifested, though, and now Gage felt more lost, worthless, and angry than ever before.

        “...I just wanted someone to tell me what to do.”

        Davy’s smile widened to a grin.